- Do not attempt to get rid of the wrinkles in your boyfriend’s nutsack with Botox injections. Remember: Botox + Bozac = Numb-Nutts for Real.
- Don’t try using a clothes iron to press out the wrinkles, either.
- Ben-Gay does not make a good lube.
- Neither – despite its name – does caulk.
- If your boyfriend attempts to get you to use a catheter to squirt mayonaise up his dickeye prior to sex, so that he’ll have an extra big, creamy nutt to bust on your face, see if you can’t at least get him to use Miracle Whip instead.
- Try not to reach for the Doritos during sex. Well, unless they’re Cool Ranch flavor.
- If you don’t know what it is, don’t put it in your mouth.
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